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By justint

So I'm sitting here in my apartment on a warm summer night with the fan going. There are a couple of fans in the house and they all present a similiar mystery. WHY DO FAN SPEED SELECTORS ALWAYS START WITH THE HIGHEST NUMBER FIRST? Do fan manufacturers just assume that people will always want the highest speed the most? My fan has three speeds (and off): fast, faster, and aerodynamic test chamber. Of course one must cycle through all these speeds in order to get to the lowest and only tolerable speed. And don't let the small knob fool you, the gearing underneath requires 10 minutes to turn from off to low. Some say that terrorists will attack us with chemical, biological, and possible nuclear weapons. These people are wrong. The terrorists are already attacking us I tell you! Through fan knobs! Fan knobs will continue to get worse and worse until the American people are reduced to nothing but mindless fools... ahhh.

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